Ramble? Why, yes I do.

Today I sat down to make a pillow.
Just a fast and easy 10 minute pillow.

Not in my sewing room- I didn't want to risk a broken leg navigating to the sewing table.

I chose to sit at our large round table in the kitchen where I could catch up on The Bachelorette

and listen for the dryer beep.

I can see the entire street from my viewpoint.

I can see that police officers are at the house down the street.

It's for sale.

A quick call to The Grapevine and I learn that SQUATTERS have moved in to the house illegally.

WTH?

The realtor is beside himself, the squatter presented the keys to the police, the police left.

WTH? again.

My next update from The Grapevine reveals that the squatters broke the lock box to obtain those keys.

The PoPo returned with back up.

But Mr. Squat had driven away in his Escalade.

Oh no.

My last update from The Grapevine was that she was walking over with her coffee to get some answers.

She hasn't called me back yet so I'll have to update you later.

But this is a reminder that these jerks still exist  in this day and age 

and not just in an old episode of Big Valley.

 (Which is the last time I heard anyone use the term squatters.)

The other concerning thing that I witnessed today was a toothpaste commercial

about a daughter studying to be a dental hygenist.  She was advising her father on toothpaste.

Because of his daughter's inspirational commentary,

the man's mouth has "really been brought to the next level".

WTH? again.

What does that even mean?  And that guy is way too happy about this lifechanger.

Did he brush with dirt before?

I am put off by this and do not buy this baloney.

If he wants his mouth taken to the next level, toothpaste ain't the way go.

Try some Ben and Jerry's Chocolate Brownie, weirdo.

Yeah.  Next.  Level.

Bam.

Ok, back to the pillow.

I made my pattern using PicMonkey, printed it out on a LaserJet printer, used Citrasolve
for transferring onto the fabric and stitched it up in no time.
I call these disposable pillows.
I made this one from old linen curtains that had sun damage
and then backed it with blue and cream ticking from my stash.
There really is no need to pay high prices for these popular pillows.

You can do it yourself.  Yes, you.
Yes, you can.  Yes, you can.  Yes, you can.
Stop sassing me.

Bruce loves to lay on the couches in the house and some heathens may even eat on them.
I feel much better with quick and inexpensive changes.
Those creamy pillows on either side?
Ikea.
For $10 each (the covers), there's no need to cry when furry beasts
 do their smooshing and digging in the white summery pillows.
They wash up easily and "the disposable" will be repurposed somewhere else.
Dill pickle chips, anyone?