A Late News Flash

Hmmmm...I forgot to schedule this post before Christmas, so please rewind a few days will you?  
It must have been the sugar!
So here it is~

I logged into my mailbox this morning and was amazed and concerned about what I found there.

First of all,  "they" want to alert me to the fact that something is growing in my stomach. Like this is news to me.  It's a watermelon.  It started growing when I was 6.  Mama said so. 

Then to my amazement and utter horror, a hot Russian skank is lusting after me and wants to have many regular sofa encounters with me.  Just regular encounters?  How rude.  

No thanks, skank.

Tessa is bored.  She's bored with her hubby.   I'm giving her the skank's contact info.

Last but certainly not least was from goop- Gwyneth Paltrow's blog.  
She wanted to share "one pan" dinners.

This recipe looks great, I'm in.

But wait... Gwyneth says that her chicken is dead easy.

I've only had one cup of coffee, so reading "this chicken is dead" is what stuck with me.
This amuses me so much that I'll be making this dead chicken for dinner tonite.
I'll let you know how my dead chicken turns out.  

Gwyneth's Dead Chicken

Okay, spam box closed.  But, dead chicken.  hahahahhahaha   And I need more coffee.

I've been creating things just for my own enjoyment for the past few weeks...and I'm really happy about that.  Goal # 1 - enjoy the peace and calm of the holidays.

Yes, it's there!  You just have to be still long enough to let it in.  I closed the door on all the crazy.  It's not welcome here.  

There are no lights on the outside of the house yet and it looks like a black hole at night.

And nothing will happen.  Magoo has been traveling- I'm alone with the pups and enjoying the hell out of it.  I've been sleeping in until 9, chatting with friends, having breakfast for dinner, and painting signs at midnite while the pups sleep by the fire.  I'm creating.  I'm happy.  Bliss.  Singing Christmas carols in my jammies and dancing with my Brucie.  If this is crazy, I hope I stay here for a very long time.

I haven't been out shopping.  Thank you UPS man. FedEx guy, you are great.  Thank you, Amazon.  But, when can I have a drone drop off my stuff?  You can find my house so easily- just drop it into the black hole! That's what satellites are for, right?  Find me, please.

To my USPS Postwoman- if you throw one more box at my door, lady....  Oops, I let that Grinch in.  But if you can't be bothered to walk three more steps so that my box isn't smashed, perhaps you should take a good look at yourself.  Be a teeny bit better.  Come on, just try.  Maybe you just need some cookies.  I can do that.  Three more steps for the cookies.

I will show you some things I have created- my special moments around the house.  Probably not until next week, but you know.  Nothing will happen.

I love you guys....I hope you find a quiet place to enjoy during the next week.  Light a candle.  Jingle a few bells.  Throw cookies at your mail carrier.  Feel the love.

I'm headed to the fireplace to have one more cuppa with my hot dogs.

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You can see the previous post for some of the things I made- at least I didn't forget that one!